while packing the notes

out of the corner of my eye,

i saw that little red book with a skull cartoon.

i stared at it for quite some time,

before removing it carefully from the pile of notes.

i have hid it,

out of sight,

out of mind.

the book that detailed my life

after what seemed like the worst phrase of my life.

" I'm a girl with many dreams,

dreams that only you can realised."

every page contained the missing, yearning and pain.

i flipped through page by page,

reading every single entry

and feeling the pain all over again.

when i turned to the last entry,

it was titled to bebe instead.

:)

i started tearing the pages out one by one,

shredding them into pieces.

then it started to pour heavily.

silently,

i thanked God for Jeremy, Gena and Laura

for significantly being there for me in my darkest moments.

yes,

i remembered.

there were many other friends too,

but to name all,

i'll probably take one week.

Jeremy and Gena,

who were constantly thinking how to cheer me up,

the strawberry cheesecake,

the thai express delivered to my place,

the hello kitty biscuits,

i remembered.

Laura,

who had the worst shit from me.

the constant partying,

puking and crying all at the same time,

running off and disappearing in the clubs,

and lastly, i tink the crying and puking and screaming combination

was THE WORSE.

THANK YOU

In life,

we lose something yet gain more in return,

isn't it?

that made us stronger in a way,

and somewhat more protective of our inner selves.