i cant even begin to tell how unhappy i have been...

last week was probably the worst,

i have had.

if you remembered,

it was the public holiday week.

there's this unspoken rule in my world that

sat and PHs are for couple.

i mean,

you go out in the streets,

what do u see?

couples!

last friday hit the club after texas poker at L's house.

and PH itself,

i went shopping alone.

cos i couldnt bear staying at home and emo the day away.

so i brave the world,

seeing couples holding each other's hand,

how i yearn for it

so so much

i shopped till my limbs ache,

ate alone at Subway with Mens Health for hours,

before i finally meet Eunice n Colleagues for Supper.

The world's with me,

everyone around me,

but yet,

why do i feel so alone,

so lonely?

You said you aint having a good time there either,

you said you were stressed with school...

we agreed to put in effort

but it came only for a day...

everywhere i go,

everything i do,

it reminds me of you.

cos you have been here,

memories lingered.

but for you,

a brand new place,

no memories of me...

you will never comprehend how i feel

everytime i give you this kind of "nonsense",

i get rebuke.

So,

i keep it all in me.

hoping one day,

it will disappear itself.

i really have to thank my colleagues.

without them with me,

i dont think i could pull through so many months.

now that im leaving,

leaving cos i thought it would be better for my future,

but yet at the same time,

im holding back.

because i know,

i probably wont meet people like them again.

and im all in to put that extra effort to maintain the friendship.

i can only hope it lasts

after all,

it takes 2 hands to clap.

i went to sing K on sat,

slept 2 hours and went to work,

and slept another hour or so before going for dinner.

i wanted to stay off alcohol this week,

cos alcohol is a depressant,

Mens Health said.

but in the end,

there's always a twist.

i said i love you yesterday to E,

and i miss you to A.

i hate myself for that.

when you left,

my heart left with you.

now,

i want it back.

because i aint happy,

for a long time.

im independent,

i like to think that i am.

it must be the "want to come, dun want to come" menses at work above,

im over the emo period.

happy vibes,

come to MAMA!

i have many many videos and pictures to post!

:)

Geminis are said to have split personalities.

whatever!